#YesAllWomen Because It Could Be Me

“You educate a man; you educate a man. You educate a woman; you educate a generation.” ― Brigham Young

I try to keep things pretty light over here. Humorous, pretty, happy, all positive things. But I am feeling kind of deep tonight…

Something I hardly ever talk about is what I did with the semester I took off in between high school and college. I volunteered for my local sexual assault 24 hour crisis intervention line. Before being alone for your 12 hour shift, there was an intense training period. The training was twice a week in the evenings as well as all day Saturday. We were taught all about sexual assault, sexual abuse, flashbacks, triggers, everything. We were taught how to ‘deal’ with women who called in while they were in crisis, suicide prevention and how to ‘talk someone down’ from taking their life.

With all of the training you receive, nothing will ever prepare you for that first phone call. The phone call from someone who tells you they haven’t gotten out of bed in a week after they were raped from their brother’s best friend – the person who they considered to be like a brother. The phone call where they blame themselves for not wearing enough clothes, for having one drink too many, or second guessing if they shouted “NO” enough times..

Phone calls like that, leave much more than an emotional effect on you. Phone calls like that change you. Phone calls like that make you realize that could be you. Phone calls like that – hearing someone live through every woman’s worst fear – makes you realize you truly are never safe.

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I am sure you have heard of the #YesAllWomen campaign which is going heavily on Twitter right now. If you haven’t you can read about it here.

I sent out a few tweets about it tonight. After my 5th tweet, my notification centre was blowing up. A lot of favourites, and retweets – yes, but I also had 12 replies from guys who were trying to argue, rationalize, or justify rape or violence against women.

There is no rationalization. There is no argument. There is no justifying.

#YesAllWomen because “What were you wearing” should never be the first question (or even a question) asked to a rape victim

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#YesAllWomen because it’s not about what she wore, or how much she had to drink, it’s about him committing a crime and assaulting her

#YesAllWomen because guys do not say “my ex has something of mine but I’m too scared to go and get it

#YesAllWomen because men don’t text each other to say they made it home safely

#YesAllWomen because men don’t have to go in pairs to the washroom

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#YesAllWomen because “It’s not rape if you enjoy it – it’s just surprise sex”

#YesAllWomen because rape should never be a joke

#YesAllWomen because I don’t want my daughter to have to constantly look over her shoulder in parking garages and having to carry her keys like a weapon

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#YesAllWomen because this hashtag has to exist; because this has to be a conversation at all

#YesAllWomen because the chance of getting attacked by a shark is 1 in 3.7M , yet the chance of being sexually assaulted in 1 in 6

#YesAllWomen because we are taught that yelling “FIRE” is more effective than yelling “RAPE”

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#YesAllWomen because if someone kills you because your shirt ‘provoked them’ they would be charged with murder

#YesAllWomen because “no” should be enough

#YesAllWomen because my college offered ‘safe walks’ where security would walk you to your car

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#YesAllWomen because being on an elevator alone with a man shouldn’t be frightening

#YesAllWomen because when a man says ‘no’ in this culture it is the end of the discussion. When a woman says ‘no’ it’s the beginning of a negotiation

#YesAllWomen Because it effects half of the total population

#YesAllWomen Because it could be me

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People Who Deserve Paper Cuts…

“A smile opened, thin as a paper cut” – Michael Chabon

Do you know what sucks? Paper cuts. They hurt like a mother trucker, the bleed like Niagara Falls, and you want to amputate your finger if you happen to get one under your nail. Maybe I am just a wimp, but I would much rather accidentally cut myself with a knife while chopping vegetables than get one of those deadly paper cuts. Is that weird?

I also get annoyed very easily by people. Well, that’s not true. I feel like I have a pretty great tolerance (I am sure Jamie is laughing while reading this) but there are certain things people do with severely annoy me. And since I am trying to be a better person, I think it is only right to get these emotions out. These are the people who deserve to have one of those Mother Trucker under the nail Niagara Falls paper cuts.

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+ People who brag about/post pictures of the numerous alarms they have to get out of bed in the morning. Why does one need to brag about setting 34 alarms spread out in 90 minutes before they need to get up? It goes off, you get up, you get ready, and you go do whatever you have to do. Snooze buttons should be illegal. Also, while typing this, I cannot rationally figure out how it even affects me, all I know is that it annoys me.

+ Multiple pictures on Instagram seconds apart of the same thing. For example a family picture taken beside the Christmas tree. Find one, Instagram it. I do not need to see the top 12 family pictures plus the top 5 couple shots, plus the 7 pictures of the dog in light up antlers.

+ I guess this one goes hand in hand with Instagram. #Instagram #hand #hands #handinhand #guessing #girl #GirlsOfInstagram #typing #laptop #me #PleaseGiveMeAPAPAERCUT #cut #paper #papercut #deserving #please #manners

+ Facebook statuses over dead beat daddies. I think some things need to be kept personal and not for your 600 closest friends to read about. Child support, custody, how much you hate them, etc. I think discussing on a FB status makes you JUST as bad as the dead beat. Go to court work it out or STFU and get in line for paper cuts.

+ Parents who cannot control their children in public. Why am I tripping over your bratty kid because you cannot say “no”? Having a kid roll around on the floor screaming and kicking is unacceptable, seriously, how bad do you REALLY need whatever you are picking up. The child is 5, pick them up and leave the establishment before I yell at them – and I will – and on your way out go get a paper cut. UNDER. ALL. YOUR. NAILS.

+ Bitchy employees. I did not walk into your place of employment and fill out the application for you, went to the interview for you, and got you the job. If you hate your job that much – quit, or don’t be bitchy to customers because I have a question regarding something in your facility. Everyone has bad days, but it does not excuse rudeness. Come here, get a paper cut and have a reason to be bitchy.

+ Lastly, for my Canadian friends who I am sure can relate… People in the Tim Horton’s Drive Thru who order 8 coffees, 3 teas, 4 – 12 pack of doughnuts, 5 breakfast sandwiches (all custom made), 2 Panini’s, and a free TimBit for their dog.. And your paper cut will be ready at the window.

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Let’s get our anger out together.

Who do YOU think deserves a paper cut?
Do you think I missed anything?
Is there anything you hate more than a paper cut?

 

Bad Weekend Turned Around

“I have to be alone very often. I’d be quite happy if I spent from Saturday night until Monday morning alone in my apartment. That’s how I refuel.” – Audrey Hepburn

Well, we definitely had an eventful weekend! It did not start off well at all..  The day of Jamie’s birthday I picked up the concert tickets we won to see Brad Paisley, with Lee Brice and Chris young. I am sure you remember The Concert That Would Have Been (Eric Church) – on our way Jamie blew a tire and we had to miss the concert – this time, he text me just after 9 AM to let me know that a kid in his department refused to come in for his Saturday morning shift, which meant that Jamie would have to work, which then meant Jamie couldn’t  go to the concert. He definitely could have gone, but he would not be getting more than 2-3 hours sleep, and that’s not fun al all. Luckily, we learned he will be back in November, so we will try to score some more tickets.

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Jamie felt horrible, so we went out for a really nice dinner. The appetizer was amazing, it was a sweet and spicy chicken with red pepper and cucumber. It wasn’t an appetizer which made you really full (thankfully) it was a really nice size. As for entrees, Jamie had these delicious looking chicken tacos, which I will get next time! I decided to venture away from the sandwich menu and go for pasta, I had a chicken and vegetable penne with a rosé sauce – and it was as good as it sounds!

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After the crazy day, I unquestionably needed a drink. I got my favourite drink which I discovered the last time we went to this restaurant. I need to buy some vanilla vodka and start experimenting. It is just that delicious.

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After dinner we went for Tim Horton’s for a dessert of iced coffee. It was nice to see a lot of the shops were getting ready for Canada Day!

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Saturday was pretty busy, while Jamie was at work my mom and went shopping and ran errands.. I finally found some sandals which I have been on the hunt for, for weeks. It took up most of our day, but when we got home, Jamie got a huge dent on season 5 of Sons Of Anarchy, and I watched a few episodes of Malcolm In The Middle.

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Sunday was nice and quiet. Jamie played video games, watched NASCAR and Hockey, and Sons of Anarchy and I practically finished Season 1 of Mike and Molly….. I Fell in love with Melissa McCarthy during Gilmore Girls, but I rekindled my love for her during this show. So funny!! I must say, before starting Mike and Molly, I watched “Spice World” for a little while. It reminded me of my childhood. I used to want to be Baby Spice – Not sure why, she is blonde and Sporty Spice is definitely prettier.. I remember being obsessed with “Stop”, I was in grade 1 when the song originally came out (I think it was 1998).

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I ended the weekend with some snuggles from Ryder. Countdown is own, T – 2 days until my birthday!!!

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How was your weekend?? What did you do?

The Time I Took Cristina To The Hospital

“After two days in the hospital, I took a turn for the nurse” – W.C Fields

Before I get into this, I just want to say it took me an hour to find a decent hospital quote. Everything I found was in regards to the cost of going to the hospital or a doctor which does not apply to us in Canada. I have no idea how all of you in the States can do it…..

1297314723906_ORIGINALTomorrow it will be the one year anniversary where my sister and I walked right through those sliding doors you see in the photo. It was definitely an eventful day for the both of us. Lets go back in time to earlier that day….

It was her 17th birthday.. She was doing co-op for school in the morning at a local bakery. I was taking the morning pretty easy as I had 3 hours of mircoeconomics that afternoon. I remember my mom coming to me and saying “Cristina text me and said she cut her finger really bad, I asked her if she wanted to be picked up, she said no, I guess she is okay”. Cristina is a notorious exaggerator when it comes to anything medical – lets just say she was kicked off of “askdoctors”… We were laughing with each other that this “cut” was probably a close encounter, as if it really was anything bad she would have come home.

A few hours pass and I am getting ready to leave for school as Cristina comes home which this demented looking bloody finger. I am unsure what happened over the next few minutes but my mom was on the phone with the doctor. She was unable to get an appointment until 2 (this was around 11), and the doctor said if it was really bad she might be sent to the hospital. Somehow I decided I should take her to the hospital and if we are still waiting around 1, we will leave and head to the doctor…. So Cristina and I head on our way (5 minutes) up the road.

I park and Cristina (who has lost a lot of blood) begins laughing to the point where she is basically chocking over “17 years ago I was at the hospital being born and now I am back at a hospital”… It was a very strange few minutes…. We get in to triage right away. The triage nurse was asking basic questions which Cristina could not answer.

“Are you Epileptic or has asthma”
“no… well yes.. No. No.. Ye…No”
“Are you on medication for it?”
“uhm not really, kind of. no, not really.”
Me: “She had asthma but she grew out of it”
Cristina: I HAD A PUFFER!
Me: She has not had a prescription in at least 10 years..

The questions continued on like that. The triage nurse had all her previous information up just verifying it all. Cristina then told her it is her 27th birthday and it is a horrible way to spend a 27th birthday. I corrected her and said 17th. Which did not impress Cristina too much.

We were sent from triage to get a bracelet. More questions. Great. Admissions asked her one simple question “Are you still living at _________” and this brilliant kid said “uhm no.. If you leave here and go down the street —–” and proceeded to give directions. So I had to pipe in again.

We were sent to the additional waiting room to see the doctor.. Which was where I snapped this beauty.

IMG_0027We meet with the doctor who unwrapped the mess. You KNOW its bad when he says “yeah thats gross”…. He explained there is nothing to stitch up but he will properly clean and wrap it and show her how to. He explained to her how if she didn’t clean it, it can get incredibly infected and if you let it go you could lose the finger. All she heard was “lose finger”. We had to go for an X-ray, as it looked so deep it wanted to make sure it did not hit the bone or there would be issues healing… She thought we were going to get the x-ray to see about amputating. She was texting people saying they were getting ready for surgery. No matter how many times I told her that she was wrong, she could not process..

We get back from x-ray and the doctor looks at it and informs us, it went as deep as the last layer of skin and the bone was good. He told us to make an appointment with the family doctor in a week so he can monitor the healing…

It was a crazy day that allowed me to miss microeconomics!!! Can’t believe it was almost a year ago!

Below is a photo of her finger for those of you who do not have a weak stomach.

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The Time We Parked On The Highway

“Canada is one of the most impressive countries in the world” – Barack Obama
Have you ever looked at those “Meanwhile In Canada” photos? There is one of a highway with an overpass where someone “tagged” with graffiti which reads “Have A Nice Day”.. Or the one I like there is a car driving in winter and there is 20 feet of snow on each side? Love it.  I felt like Sunday morning was a typical “meanwhile in Canada” photo.
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Jamie and I were on our way to Toronto to watch my cousin play hockey. It was snowing but nothing major. The roads were good, nothing bad. We were going 100 (KM, for those of you who would otherwise assume we were on the Autobahn) Then out of no where there was police car that had its lights flashing and brought traffic down to 40 (which is slower than a residential area speed limit). It was kind of weird as we had no idea what was going on. We did this for maybe 7 minutes until we found ourselves at a complete stop. We were able to see that we were at the front of whatever was going on, but still too far back to really see what the issue was.
 
What really stuck me as funny was how calm the whole situation was. Usually when you hear about a highway being closed and in park there seems to be a lot of chaos, honking and displeasure. If you looked around people were getting out of their vehicles. One guy changed his washer fluid, there was a woman who got a novel from her trunk (I just put my arm out of the window for a photo). We turned the radio on to hear what was going on. Thats when the “you know you are in Canada when..” happened. A car spun out so although no one was hurt, they closed the highway until salt trucks could come and salt some ice to prevent more cars in the ditch.
 
Yes, the did in fact take place 9 days after “The concert that would have been” so of course, I lost my “roll up the rim” cup –  Jamie did also. We truly have been having an eventful few weeks which is fantastic. This time last year we had the February Blues really really bad, so I will take it!

The Concert That Would Have Been

“It’s hard to get concert tickets.” – John Hawkes

Roughly 3 or 4 months ago, our local country radio station was giving away Eric Church concert tickets. Jamie and I tried religiously to be caller 12 – with low expectations (I was in  – and lost – a draw for a meet and greet with Brad Paisley). Anyways, one morning, Jamie was caller 12! As he was driving and it’s illegal to drive and talk, I took the phone and answered all the questions. A few weeks later they called and said the tickets arrived. We were pretty exited, went and picked them up, and waiting the 3 months until the concert – which was last Friday (the 15th).

We left after Jamie finished work and headed to the concert.. Then this happened.

Untitled-2To summarize that up.. We were barely out of town and Jamie’s tire blew up. I was completely oblivious – but I also was not driving. I called home as I briefly remember having a discussion with her about how stupid it was to pay for CAA as we never use it – oops!… She told me that my dad was on his way to meet us as he had to be the one to call. He showed up, called, and and 45 minutes later CAA showed up. He was unable to get the spare off. Apparently on trucks it is common for the tire holder thingy to seize up. The truck had to be towed to Canadian Tire in hopes that 1) they could get it off 2) they have tires to purchase.. It was evident at this point that we would not be making the concert. On the way to Canadian Tire I sent a text to my friend seeing if she wanted the tickets. I would rather have someone take them, then it go to waste. She never answered me which was strange, so I sent a text to her sister who informed me she was at work – so I offered (and she gratefully) took the tickets. We did the swap at CT, as we waited for my dad, the tow truck guy, and the truck to show up..

Finally the truck came and that is when things started to spiral down. We learned that Jamie’s truck tires are bigger than the standard ones, and that they do not carry those ones – great. Then, we learned that they would have to be ordered in, and that it would take 3-5 days to be delivered. Today  (Monday) is a holiday, so they would not be able to order the tires until Tuesday – perfect. Then we learned it was some ridiculous price of like $315/each… Jamie told them to do whatever they could to get the spare off. At this point we had no idea if it was a full size tire, or just a  little one, which will have to make due until the new tires come. After they welded this tire off (thankfully for Jamie) it was a full size tire, and his rim was fine…

Jamie tweeted about the event:

UntitledLater that night we got to see photos of what would have been our pretty great seats.

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It was definitely a night we were not anticipating.

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Was your Friday night better?

That’s That Shit I Don’t Like.

“In time we hate that which we often fear.” -William Shakespeare

This originated from the song “I Don’t Like” by Kanye West. I know this because I googled the lyrics am just so gangsta in my every day life. I would have also posted the lyrics, however there is one words which I don’t use which is repeated (I counted) 20 times, so I thought it would just be better to describe it.. You could also google the lyrics if you are not as gangsta as I am. Essentially he just goes on about all the “shit” he doesn’t like. I was going to title this “that’s that stuff I don’t like”, but I am pretty passionate about my hatred so I thought I should be more serious with using “shit”.. So lets do this yo!

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1) Chipping worn off nail polish or unkept nails. This disgusts me. I cringe. I care a lot about my nails and I put a lot of time into maintaining them. When people do not care about their nails, it just boggles my mind. I paint my nails at least once a week, sometimes every other day. It irritates me more when nails are all different lengths. Is it that hard to pick up a file and get it symmetrical? Dirty nails are even worse. Clean that dirt from under there. You cannot look “clean” when your nails are full of dirt. That’s that shit I don’t like.

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2) No “Your Welcomes”. I hate going out somewhere and order a coffee, food, so have you, and I respond with “Thank you” and it is not accompanied by a “You’re welcome”. Excuse me? I will even stand/not drive forward, I will even repeat myself until I get a “You’re welcome”. I think this stems back from my childhood when my mom would go all exorcist on us for not using “please/thank you/you’re welcome”. If I’ve repeated my “Thank you” 2, 3, 4, 5 times with no response I will use my facial expressions to get my point across. That’s that shit I don’t like.

IMG_00103) Rude employees. This goes hand in hand with the above. If I was not the one to piss you off there is not reason for you to be rude to me. If you hate your job that much, QUIT. Otherwise I expect a smile and some type of friendliness. I was not the one who walked you into your place of employment, I was not the one who forced you to fill out an application, I was not the one who forced you to go to that interview, and I was not the one to force you to take that job. Nope, that was all you honey. So be happy or quit. That’s that shit I don’t like.

4) Private parties at a place of business. This too, goes with the above hate.I hate going to the bank, to get my nails done, to update my health card, etc, then you get up to that little till to discuss what you are there for (on sitting there while your nails are getting shaped) and then you feel as though you are interrupting a private conversation party with the staff at the said establishment. If I am attempting to deposit money, I do not need to hear about how your boyfriend upset you last night and how sad you are. Talk about this with your work friends on lunch. It’s awkward. Do I give my input? Do I act like the third wheel? No, I awkwardly stand there with a stupid look on my face. That’s that shit I don’t like.

IMG_0012IMG_0016 5) Hair extensions. I have pretty long hair. I took this photo yesterday – it’s long. It’s taken a long long time to grow. I take pride in the fact that it is all natural. This hair extension fad disgusts me. You want longer hair? Take the time to grow it. Buy all the products, the argon oils, the hair masks, the heat protectants, go frequently for trims. Don’t do this whole extension thing. Do you know what irritates me the most about it? After years of hair growth I am asked “Are you wearing extensions” or “How did you get your extensions to look so natural”… The minute I look offended and say “it’s real” they immediately come in to touch it. I do not like being touched, especially by people I don’t know. That’s that shit I don’t like.

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6) Talking for no reason. Chit chat with strangers in a public area such as a waiting room. Just because of the simple fact that we happen to be at the same place at the same time does not for any means suggest I want to talk to you. Call me anti-social. I don’t want to hear your life story, I do not want to know about your children, boyfriend’s sister, neighbours lovers lawn maintainance guy, I don’t care. Just because we are in the same place, does not for a second say “please talk to me”, and my God, you think the fact I am holding a book would indicate this. That’s that shit I don’t like.

7) Unintelligent conversation. This can either stand alone, or fall into the above area. I cannot stand unintelligent conversation. I cannot be bothered to listen. I cannot be bothered to contribute. I cannot be bothered to do anything besides looking bored. That’s that shit I don’t like.

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8) 8 year olds in strollers. Okay, I believe if your child can walk there is no reason to inconvenience all the surrounding people in public places with your giant stroller. Have you seen the kids who are hitting 10 and being pushed around? My God, these kids have to contort their body to fit in there. They are playing on their iPads, texting, and doing homework while you push them around. How do you not stare at that? That’s that shit I don’t like.

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What’s that shit that you don’t like?